I left my heart in San Fransisco, but I left something else in the bathroom

You already know American Standard makes the finest toilets in the land (or pretty darned good ones, anyway), but did you know they also have their very own corporate theme song? Take a seat and grunt along with the pear-shaped tones of My Bathroom.

Miss Leading

I was at the local mall the other day and noticed a sign in the window of Victoria's Secret that read, "All bras and panties half off." Naturally, I went inside.

Imagine my disappointment.

There's just no pleasing some people

A strange case in Oklahoma: Offered a plea bargain deal of 30 years in prison for attempted murder and robbery, the convicted man asked the sentence to be increased to 33 years to match Larry Bird's jersey number. A big fan, it seems. The District Attorney agreed to the request.

The story

Overdue Diligence

Sydney police are on the ball. An elderly man who had been missing for nine days was found sitting in his car in a parking lot, dead. A parking ticket had been placed on the car the day before his body was discovered. Apparently, he was in the car, dead, at the time the police officer wrote out the ticket.

The story

Abbey-cho

Sumo comes to New York. (Reuters)